innominepatrick | (no subject)

Current Mood: distressed

(no subject)

[Away from creepy Bad Guys]

Right, so. The Irish Firespitter knows I'm in the city.

Jussssst great.

fuck. I was hopin we left the shitter creaturess behind. i don't like the spitty ones.

I am not fond of the spitter ones either. Any of the ones who skin things I could do without. Especially since they all pretty mad at me.

well t'be fair you didn't relly go about makin friends wit everyone.

No I did not. I know why they are not pleased with me but I'm not the same as I was then.

O well in that case why dnt we just go and tell them? I'm sure theyll understand.

Actully, you can tell them. I'm not goin anywheere near.

Are you trying to be sarcastic or are you actually suggesting that because it's hard to tell with you. And I don't think that would work.

Do i really need to try to be sarcastic? You dont say.

What, or who, is the Irish Firespitter?

Oh, just Caorthannach the Devil's Mother and she probably wants to eat me whole.

Do I have to cut a bitch? Because I totally will.

So for a minute I thought that was a kind of snake, and I was wondering why you were talking to snakes.

But it's just some evil Celtic lady instead. I threatened to stab her.

In this instance, I fully support your obsession with stabbing things.

I'd call it a hobby rather than an obsession.

As someone who's been on the pointy end, I guess we'll have to agree to disagree.

Hey, I didn't actually stab you. I was just startled and stab-y in your general direction for a little bit.

True. But it was still less than fun having the tip in my throat.

...Wow, that came out dirtier than I planned...

I just choked on my tuna, thanks for that.

You are quite welcome, Patrick dearest. I live to entertain. And remotely choke people with tuna, apparently.

You are most talented.

Oh good, make her angrier. That will help.

Dude, she's already trying to revenge-murder you, I think her amount of anger is not very relevant to how much she wants you to die.

Oh, also, she says that you just came up and murdered her totally innocent self. I am assuming there's more to the story than that?

The story of Hawk's Well.

Oh and apparently I just found a new website with a lot of wrong information.

That GIF at the top is creeping me out so much.

So can she actually spit fire? Gross.

I promise not to don a beard and grab a curly cane and do this at the end of your bed while you try to sleep.

And poison water. Make thirsty.

You don't understand, Patty, I would be scarred for life.

I get weirdly entertained by legends that can no long work in the modern day. I'm picturing you sighing, buying some bottled water, and continuing the chase.

I wouldn't put it past her to poison that too.

Well, we can cut her head off and toss her in the ocean if she gets rude.

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